heart broken

lately patrick wouldn't let me carry him out of the bath tub after bathtime. he wants his dad to do that. so i asked him why.

patrick: "i want dadda.."
me: "why? dadda is busy right now. how bout mommy?"
patrick: "NO!"

this could go on for several minutes until he feels cold. And then he would relent and let me wrap him in towel.

me: "why don't you let mommy carry you? don't you like mommy?"
patrick: "no."

*audible gasp from me*

me: "why??"
patrick: "nyanya too busy.."

my heart broke.

me: "you mean i'm always busy to play with you?"
patrick: "yessssss.."

my heart just shattered into pieces. he did, however, ended the conversation with a happy note, giving me kisses and a big hug (he likes that barney song 'i love you you love me we are happy family'). but i'm still speechless. i vowed there and then to give him more time and be more patient with him. it's hard, but i'm going to do it. for my boy's sake.